Thursday, August 2, 2007

Talk about a pricey piece of sh^#!!

Oh, this one is a kicker. In leau of the sensitive subject matter....if the word 'matter' is the right adjective......we decided to put a caveat with this post:

Not suitable viewing for those with sensitive stomachs, or are eating while viewing this.

You see, the other day I had taken off my pants to throw into the wash, and left my pockets' contents laying on the carpet next to my side of the I always do. Amongst the contents of my pocket was about $10.00 in ones, and a five. The next night, I went to get a few bucks out of that pile of stuff to give to the girls because they were going to go buy some chocolate chips at the Nikiski store, to bake...chocolate chip cookies. Yummy, yummy! I was a little rattled when I found my money gone. I mean, I know I put it there the night before, and was sure I never spent it, like it was suggested to me. But it was gone. I dwelled on it for a couple days, thinking maybe I actually left it in the pants and the cycle of wash sucked into the vortex where 'things left in pockets' go during such cycles of wash. Maybe it got kicked out of the scattered pile and was under the bed? Not to be. I was bummed. I mean, money is money, and when you aren't making much, every little bit counts. Although I wrote it off as an unsolved mystery, it was in the back of my mind and I couldn't help but wonder where it went.

Days later I am sitting at the PC and I hear Maryann in a loud and drawn tone yell from outside very as a matter of factly..."you have got to be kidding me....". Now I knew that Michelle was out helping Maryann pick up the lawn, as Maryann was getting ready to mow it. But then if you know Maryann, it doesn't take much to amuse I figured nothing of what I heard. Within a minute of her befuddled cry, she comes in and tells me she realizes I am busy, but I have to come and see this. She promises me it is well worth it. I made the error of doubting her on that promise. I didn't leave my chair. A minute or so later, she comes back in with Michelle and a shovel. There on the shovels head is a ripe pile of dog pooh. And there, stuck right in the middle of that ripe pile of dog pooh, is what resembles a crumpled up wad of money...... Oye. As it would become obvious to us, our little 'eat anything she finds' rat dog Kenai, hoovered into our room, and for some unknown reason ate....., no, consumed my $10.00. And of course did what dogs do, crapped it out on the lawn the next day, where Michelle found it, cleaning up the pooh piles for Maryann to mow the lawn. Now hows that for a solved mystery Scooby Doo?!
As of tonight, the evidence sits next to garage, still encased in its brown tomb as you see in the photo, because nobody has the stomach to dissect it to find out just how much money is that there turd! Believe me you, I have never seen people so observant of picking up dog pooh as they are now, knowing that the next pile may be that "million dollar baby"! It just keeps getting better, here in Alaska!!


mike kiriluk said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
mike kiriluk said...

in reference to your pile of "Scooby Doo"...sandblast the sucker and make it quick...if one of them mooses gets the scent he/she may decide to sample it and then you will be faced with an even bigger "problem"....