Yes, it's true. I have long yearned to be in the most important ranks of product planning and safety. It's true, for years I have sighed...cussed....spit...arghed...laughed myself into a frenzy....and even sung songs, spontaneously blurting out lyrics that have even amazed my wife... All in the name of product packaging. Oh, the list goes on from the Kirkland brand milk cartons that will almost inevitably spill each time you pour a cup of milk, the razor sharp plastic packing that everything from tools to toys come in...of which I have lacerated myself with many times over the years. To those idiotic 'eco friendly' gas cans that they came out with a few years back. The ones you had to read instructions to figure out how to use and spilled more gas than a typical gas can could ever concieve.... The lids that a poor senior has to hire a young and spry go-getter to undo just so they can eat. And how about those chip or candy packaged that can only be opened by pulling opposite directions, the foil bag ends that retain them so that wheh the ends finally do give, the contents spray airbound and all over! The list goes on and for years I have been dismayed over it all. I think it was right after the Tylenol poisonings in the 80's that company's began to hire over educated thinkers to design people proof containers.....and by god they have over the years succeeded and it seems to just keep getting worse, this move towards over achievement!! They have gotten so good with it that the simple minded, the elder, the strong...the weak, the spastic, the over medicated, the wise, essentially most of society in general cannot normally function in the face of people proof products! And so I want to be an idiot, just like the brainards who sit in corners of cubicles, being overpaid to be stupid! I think that would be so cool to be able to fool society into thinking that they know how to open something, all the while getting paid to know that I will foil their every attempt and logic. I could spend my days thinking of ingenious ways to keep people out of everything they use as a normal course of life. Imagine: people proof toilet paper rolls.....perfect for the times that you just need a roll because the person before you forgot to reload. Kid proof video games that they can only open if they are hopped up on candy and power drinks climbing the walls backwards. I could eliminate alcoholism by inventing people proof beer and liquor bottles. They can only be opened by slamming them into a curb. Bandages that can only be opened with your teeth for those times that that both phalanges are bloody stumps... I suppose the list would be endless, and all the while I would get paid for being a complete idiot in designing impractical packaging! You would never guess who spilled the milk just one too many times now....?
We awoke to a baby moose at the patio table yesterday morning. Mind you, this is only about a month and a half old. Was too cute. When mama came down the driveway looking for it, she had a look of disdain on her face almost like baby had gotten too curious and wandered away. And the moment baby saw mom, skipped off as to say..."mommy, mommy, look what I found..." Not sure which mama/baby team this was, as I think there are a few running around our immediate area! Other than that summer has been quiet, mild, sunny and fun, with lots of time to streak about what with the kid gone now! Check out Marlin Perkins' Wild Kingdom at the compound....
Where's the food, man!?
While mom is away the calf will play?
Keep in mind, the weeds mom is standing in are about 4 foot high....
Now, this bewildered fella is a stunned Ptarmigan who pummeled himself into the front door window. 'Buddy the bear's' head seemed like the perfectly logical spot to put his hemispheres back in phase.
Funny thing is that this little guy let me walk within a couple feet of him and feared not to flutter off. Kind of helps I suppose when your head is not on straight! He stayed on Buddy's head through the night and finally flew off the next morning after Maryann left for the office.